Eulogy - Qistina

Being born in this innocent world on the eve of 25th Oct. '86, by my mother, was a joy to my family because I was the first and only daughter at that time. I was brought up in a very happy family, all of us were closely attached to one another. We are best friends. Mak, you are the best. You are my everything mummy. I will definitely miss you tons. Daddy or sometimes I call Bapak, I'm sorry for everything. I wished we could spend more time together. I know we didnt talk much. I missed being your daddy's little girl Pa. 17/10/07 - remember that date dad. I love you too. Siblings - love, love, love. Along, you will hell miss teasing me, updating my resume, going to concerts and get crazy together! Its ok, you have the kiddies to do so. Angah, I'm sorry. I wished we could be like before. Diyana, Asrar, Sofia, Khaleef, this world is more than what you are seeing now. There's still lots of things that you will learn. Be good. No one will play with your hair, read bedtime stories, feed you, go swimming together, but it's okay. Kak Tina @ Aunty Na will not be able to do that for the rest of my life. Mak Cah not to forget, we've been through alot together. We cried and laughed together. LOVE.

To others,
Everytime everyone turns their back on me, when my own close circle of friends betray me, I nevertheless am strong in going through all hardships. I have no intentions of showing my weakness and sorrow to those who have misused my trust. Since I am so capable of putting trust towards those who I love, I am easily hurt in the process. As concrete I may seem on the outside, internally I am fragile at heart. For someone I dearly have affection to, I will sacrifice everything to make him or her happy, even if me at times in constant pain.

Amongst the goodness in me, I also bear weaknesses to my name. Although these weaknesses however underweigh my utter goodness, it may seem appropriate to mention. I for one thing, continue to engage in unfulfiling acts that deem to indirectly against the words of my father. As hard as I try not to, I however am unconscious of me doing so. If only I could redemp all my past actions to fit that of his wishes, I would trade everything. On terms of relationships, I am the partner who place my other half's needs in against my own and as a consequence become a victim of him to take me for granted.

Family, friends, and people who know me..forgive me for everything I've done, I've said..directly or indirectly. You know I LOVE YOU. I'm sure each of you know.